Those who do not know how to weep with their whole heart don't know how to laugh either

I'll be really sad when Ugly Betty ends. I have come to appreciate the show a great deal. For one I love the characters. The stories they tell are unique. And the show makes me laugh. And laughing is good for the soul. And this episode tonight was about following our own dreams and our passions. Which I feel like in this day and age can be quite hard. I am already exhausted and I just contemplated chasing one of my many dreams or daydreams I have over the course of an afternoon. Why is it so hard to grasp that concept? We've been given a heavy burden to bear. Lassoing the American Dream. Which could quite possibly be dead, I am not sure. I think Reagan killed it. Maybe I dunno. Life Goals, 20 Year Plans. I am just trying to make it through the day to be completely honest, how am I supposed to even fathom two decades from now? Finding the Love of Our Lives. I love romantic comedies enough so yeah I guess I am a romantic, but really when there's so much hate around these days it is so hard to remember what love is? It's exhausting trying to live out loud, fully, truly and authentically. I think I'd rather just stay in bed.
But I suppose if the characters of Ugly Betty can make their own way in the world, maybe I can too. Betty Suarez makes it to London and has an epiphany. She's going after her dreams of writing about things that matter. Amanda decides to leave Mode and make it in the world of fashion as a stylist. These characters decide to follow their dreams. To live. It sounds so simple doesn't it. I guess I am envious of characters on a television show. I guess I want the leap. To dive in head first. To feel that exhilaration and to know that I am headed down the right path. But really who can tell? There are so many different ways to live this life. So many roads to go down. I have lived well. I do believe that. But sometimes it is easy to forget. To go numb and be desensitized. I guess I miss weeping with my whole heart.